When you say:” ‘Belief’ and support can come from friends and counsellors. When matters are of political significance ,it is very awkward for professionals to be upfront and they are often scared to say anything which may be considered not to be p.c. And I see mums and dads ‘fighting’ the system and each other to prove they are the better parent. How should it be corrected? Social work in itself is a profession based on left wing ideology, and many left leaning people have a negative bias towards males. And perhaps most importantly, and touched on by many at the conference and afterwards. I hope this is helpful to why their might be this “mindest” as the President of the Family Courts put it in a judgement. I am sure the alarm bells should have been ringing loud and clearly, however, in this instance they weren’t listened to! Sarah, I do appreciate your comment, but you cannot really deny the corruption now out in the open as a result of the on going public enquiry nor the corruption widely reported in many parts of the country which has been described as ‘cultural’ within social services departments over at least the last sixty years. Family court will stop being bias against men when they have the same legal right to terminate legal obligations that women have towards unborn children and children that aren’t theirs. Yes, that evidence could be just the words of the parties, but for serious allegations I would expect to see some supporting evidence. It isn’t rocket science, early intervention needs investment (from our taxes) but it saves money in the long term as well as the human cost. The men that hide behind the women in this system are punks that just do what they want. I do not have to ‘entertain’ what you say. Hello, yes I did wonder myself ., however, it was stated by A to B whilst already in a relationship. There is of a lack of awareness of domestic abuse , both in the wider society and in state departments who supposedly protect children. Website Privacy Policy & Terms of Use. Many thanks Fact-Seeeker ‘Many men, quite a lot of the time, appear to see looking after young children as boring, unrewarding, low status and they don’t want to do it.’ – WTF ??? When you go to court, you can expect that the judge that is hearing your case is impartial and will treat both sides in a fair manner. They have been cut to shreds and that affects the most vulnerable in our society, other people might be able to pay for expensive therapy for example (all therapy is expensive even if some of it is very worth it). If its all a waste of time, please feel free to spend your time more productively elsewhere. This is about the choices people make and the values they have. This is a clear and keen concern for many; see for example the recent speech by McFarlane LJ. NMO and occupation Order are granted immediately to A with powers of arrest attached to B If there is any allegation of a breach. Sarah, I do agree with you that many men are not up to child-care which is why I suggested the law which should automatically give preference to the woman pending a divorce hearing. Is it because areas of work dealing with children are seen as low status? There is confusion about this very pivotal point and we all need to be clear what the legal position is – and indeed on what our society’s position is. On brief facts alone! pretty much all of them when thing don’t go their way. The police referred the incident to LA services Perhaps, I’m old fashioned but I certainly would not be forcing Mum to let me have regular contact by court -order but if a court ordered contact ,I would obey the order. Girls should be much more careful about going out with men alone and men should be taught moral, gentlemanly values including not to sow their wild oats with abandon as currently seems to be encouraged .Wait until the wedding before having children. It should be remembered that family courts must rely on facts. Neil Gorsuch's comments indicate that he is extremely biased and anti-democracy. Another world authority in this area is Bruce Duncan Perry. This is totally on par with medievil witch trials. Both men and women have been foul, rude and abusive in their replies to me on this topic and I thus am contemptuous of them all. Stuffs out his vacant garments with his form” See I will counsel my male children most seriously never to marry or cohabit with a woman. Do not smother it in some kind of unpleasant sarcasm. A lot of women who were stay at home moms refuse to seek employment all the while expecting the ex husband to fund her ‘accustomed lifestyle’. Get real!i However, I had to pay over half my income to my ex wife. A was hardly at the home, popped in now and again. This is very new area of study. I have read the thread with interest due to being in the same boat as many non resident parents with certain allegations in the air. Any way one slices it, when parents have to go to court to resolve disputes around their children, something has gone severely wrong and both the mother and the father – regardless of how they believe (rightly or wrongly) themselves to be in the right and the other to be in the wrong – should be aware of this fact. So ,in my opinion as an ordinary parent, the main problem lies there. Honestly, this was a waste of our time Sarah. Regarding bias in family courts ,probably the bias is not malicious ,I hope not, but it matters not one iota to the poor children whether it is or not. No charges against her because she claimed PPD whoch was a lie. There are no children. Considering the above, there seems to be a fundamental principle underpinning the actions of some of the family court that if a mother expresses an inappropriate belief, it is more likely to be treated as true, whereas if a man expresses an inappropriate belief, it is more likely to be treated as false. I understand the lack of transparency etc. The extent and direction of it differs and putting more stats about it is largely futile. I am not apologising. The International Court of Justice (ICJ) consists of fifteen permanent judges, each of whom shall come from a different State. So generous in fact that I believe 2 children do not require that much money to comfortably bring up. I enjoyed the article. 3 hearings in all the last 2 of which my spouse did not attend. Hope readers understand and that this helps the discussion along. We spoke cordially before the court proceedings started and met for walks and lunch. They can’t possibly condone a situation where a child may be put in harms way. If you find what I say hectoring, abusive or unhelpful – don’t engage. My view, as an ordinary parent bearing in mind the separation of powers and other principles , is that should the young girl in question and other damaged children need money spending on their care especially medical care then it is the duty of the authorities to supply it . Jargon and Cliche in professional practice, Interim Removal and Emergency Protection Orders, I want to appeal or discharge the care order. Like you, I would certainly personally settle for a system that didn’t actually make things worse. We welcome more minds and hearts! It has become an instrument to unjustly enrich ex-wives and rip apart families in the most clumsy fashion. Where we may disagree is how this inherent bias ‘must’ be corrected. There are hundreds of children in dire situations. Please see my review, it might help with you threads of research. I appreciate it might be nothing and marginal but why do you consider it to be “he impregnated her”? It could be in ten years time ,those who favour sending babes to nursery are stuck in the past. You get a skewed picture if you only look at part of it. .maybe info from Eastern block Orphanages in the 1980’s? The courts continue to enthusiastically agree to her every request to reexamine my income just in case there is more money to be squeezed out of me, and have no problem in chasing me interminably for arrears but when it comes to the fact that my relationship with my son has been destroyed, there is zero interest. ( I wonder if many women are prone to let it go at first in the false hope that he will change, perhaps Sam could comment). It is their task to make it available . Instead, we have mothers putting their children in child care when children are less than a year old and then spending an average of only 2 hours per day with their children, much of that in front of the TV. All allegations should be treated with the same weight regardless of gender and all safeguarding techniques should be implemented equally. “I do not regard a governmental policy of enforced austerity or enforced lack of resources as a pressing social need which justifies ignoring the convention.”. I must have missed the fact that you were commiserating. If you want to help the children remove the comment or apologies for being hurt at the time and move in from the polar extreme. Most men respect their wives very much and will do their very best to support and protect them .Some men just cannot do it (perhaps they are on the dole) and then we have a powder keg because idle brains leads to escapism (perhaps drugs) on his part. In what capacity? I sat in a court only last month and listened to an arrogant, sanctimonious female judge attempt to lecture me on the ‘seriousness of the situation’. Why has a District Judge made such an order on a one sided ‘story’? or example the recent speech by McFarlane LJ. I would be interested to assist in any way I can with furthering the debate that is so sorely needed. What is needed is MONEY. If you don’t appreciate critique of what you have to say, perhaps blogging isn’t for you. This is bias to all non residentical parents from the outset and not just fathers, the residential parent then has the maitanence service who come collecting for payment, they won’t stop unless the resident parent decides to. e) have juries in the family court. It has to be enforced.Thus if the LA’ flout procedures and make no real effort to discuss support or offer it perhaps not even talking tp parents the lawyers should protest. What I think you are saying is that the family court is pragmatic and that there is no intentional bias. Thank you for your kind words. I agree that judges and other workers are unlikely to consciously decide to show bias when they go to work on Monday morning but the results are the same.m as if they did. Unfortunately it isn’t possible to make someone reform. That is the job of politicians who make the budgets and decide the policies. A simple comment like that can fuel narrow minds easily. There may be things I need on my list, or things you think shouldn’t be there. In a 2004 Minnesota survey of Supreme Court judges, 56 percent supported the idea that children belong with their mother as a blanket statement. Thanks Sarah. It has only been made possible because we can now view brain functioning dynamically and correlate this wih behavior and development. As several studies and publications have reported, females victims approx 57%, males victims 43% There have been considerable advances in dynamic brain imaging over the past 20 years. Now I’m going to broach another taboo. But do you not agree that this kind of dancing around people exhibiting controlling and abusive behaviour to keep them sweet is exactly what people mean when they say judges too often try to keep mum happy – in intractable cases? Same with the educationalists and social workers, one minute they are castigating working mums for leaving children too early and the next for not sending them to nursery. An example of confusion, in my view:- The Family Court is just not capable of doing the job on the ‘B of P’ especially because of the innate bias when a month later the losing party will just bring the case back to court. There is now plenty of evidence that negative early childhood experiences with their caregiver, can result in reduced brain volumes and connections in very important ways. Nature’s way, unsurprisingly. The victim’s barrister would speak out and protest. To which my mother replied “No mother would……..blah blah” Once I pointed out the societal impunity offered to mothers that she had just admitted to, her eyes were opened and she realised what she had just said and done. If you are forced to deal with a biased a judge in a family law case, there may be some things you can do to battle these biases. Indeed it is quite absurd to suggest it. I am not ‘sexist’. For e.g. If a man isn’t even charged. I arranged childcare, school runs, packed lunches, etc. Never lawyers or police. Fill out the form below and we will get back to you in a timely manner. I mentioned that if *** or her mother ever lay a finger on my son (due to knowing a history of neglect and abuse within the family) I’d be furious (abusive….???? I don’t agree there is a ‘negative bias’ towards males but I do think the preponderance of female personnel in the system can put men at a disadvantage because women tend to react differently to what men may see as ‘just letting off steam’ for eg. This approach is costly and time consuming but it can determine more likely who is biased … My comment was intended to make readers think about their conduct and how we might study the triggers and put a stop to violence. You say: “The government has …. And btw its ‘argument’. Giving the rest of us a bad name. False claims are abhorrent and should be criminal – but when I represent men I recognise them and fight them and I certainly have never encouraged a client to make up or exaggerate claims. you disagree ‘wholeheartedly’. Dear Sarah – you are a remarkable lady and I want to thank you for your contribution to the FNF conference. Our children’s problems are more mundane sadly. https://www.bailii.org/ew/cases/EWFC/OJ/2018/B64.html, http://www.gov.scot/Resource/0051/00515142.pdf. This superficially simple question encapsulates the difficulties in this area. I have made this gender neutral so This does not sway anyone’s thought process in any responses that may follow: A and B have been in a relationship for one year and the relationship breaks down. If it is alleged that a man is violent towards his wife but there are no police reports supporting that, or medical evidence, and the wife says it doesn’t happen – then challenge that account. I disagree with your statement wholeheartedly. They have to respect the strict directives laid down to them which include budgetary decisions made for them. If this was law, it would deter men from abandoning a mum and then thinking he can take the children too. I do agree though, that there is this perception and belief amongst many that women are more vulnerable and should be treated with kid gloves and that men don’t need the same treatment. Many times, litigants are unhappy with the judge, and I often get questions about how judges get selected for family law. I have been reminded of my actions socially and professionally and repeatedly made to take responsibility for my behaviour. It is now becoming apparent that child emotional abuse or neglect, is just as serious and perhaps even more serious than all the other types of abuse. They don’t have juries in Family Courts so there will always be an element of bias . I very much doubt you really know anything about it, because it is so new and also quite technical. Wow, I can’t believe that sexism is allowed to be so rampant in our society. It will take a few days for me to find the core research papers that I have been working on, which will serve as an index into the new brain research being done iro early childhood adversity and its impact on brain development. A woman can never be equal to a man and never, ever will a man be able to equal a woman’s touch in child-care particularly with HER OWN BABY. I have stopped fighting and have no expectation that I will ever again see my child. simple yes or no ! After a 4.5 year legal case with no contact with my (now) 10 year old daughter for nearly 18 months towards the end of the case, the judge at the final hearing last march transferred my daughters residence so she now lives with me. I chose to spend my time differently so I will not be engaging any further with you. I think children can come to harm by sending them to nursery too early in fact there is even a ‘theory’ that autism can be caused by it. 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